Tag Archives: mumblings

A friend in need…

How young were you when you first heard the line : ‘A friend in need is a friend indeed’.Throughout our childhood,we have been taught in school,at home to choose friends wisely,to read a person.And during that discourse we more than often were bombarded with the ‘in need indeed’ saying. Did we really understand at that time what it meant?What did we take from it?

I definitely learnt something from it,to help your friends and be with them no matter what the situation.Was it because of this that it got imbibed or that I met such great friends over the years that it came naturally I do not know.But over the years friends became most important part of my life.But only recently did I realise that this line has a different lesson altogether.It does not (only) guide you how to be a good friend,but guides you how to identify your true friends.

Because there comes a time in your life,when all you need is a true friend by your side,to tell you that everything will be ok..and you find yourself starving for friendship.This is the time when you realise that a friend in need is a friend indeed.And like a reinforcement to what you already knew,comes the truth…that your friends  sitting across the seven seas are closer to you than the ones that you rub your shoulders with.It’s amazing that with their own set of problems, issues and umpteen amount of work,they still think of you,sense your needs and care enough to make you feel less lonely.

So how much do the others matter really? The ones that don’t care about anything but getting together, having a good time.Or when they are in need.Are they not good friends?May be they are,just not close enough.May be not friends in the real,deeper sense.May be they are better friends to someone else.All you can do is hope, that they indeed are,and treasure your own close ones!

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Going Crazy (or trying not to)

Yesterday I saw something that totally amazed me.I saw a man laugh… a man who I have known  to be an eternally angry and serious person.I saw him watching television and laugh like an innocent toddler over something that frankly wasn’t even funny.I thought to myself : has he gone crazy?

In the next instant I realised how inappropriate the thought was,and how casually the C – word is used these days, by everyone.Going crazy is actually far more big a deal than it sounds to us.It is insanity.Something that is considered to be irreversible. So really,no one around you is crazy(positively). But then, why is the word used so often? Because we all act like crazy people sometimes.Every now and then, or rarely… but surely, we all have our moments of craziness. We get tired of being the person that we want the world to think we are.Sometimes we want to surprise ourself. Sometimes it becomes a thing that just needs to be done. It is better to have some of these slips, than to bottle up the pressure that would eventually drive you crazy.

So let go all of your tensions for sometime.Surprise yourself.Sing in the office,dance in the rain,shout in a tunnel,sit silently in a corner,crack jokes on your boss(at your own expense),buy balloons for no reason,race to the mountain top,wear fancy clothes…do something out of the routine,that you always wanted to do.Let people stare,you can stare at them when it’s their turn.Be crazy in a moment than for a lifetime!

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She sat by the window reminiscing about the past few days. They had changed her. In what way she did not know. But she knew it was time for her to decide. It was time, yet again, to decide between the two halves of her mind. Between what was right and what was wonderfully joyful. She was never good at choosing the right path whenever she was confronted by the heartless crossroad. Through the window, she looked at the roaring clouds, and then beyond them. Please don’t let it rain on me, she prayed, not to the clouds…to no one in particular.

 

She sat down at her usual bench in the only decent public park in the city and took out her book to pretend to read. There was hardly anyone in the park so early in the evening, but she did not want to seem crazy staring into nothingness to any stranger. In her mind, she was still at the cross roads and choosing the right path still seemed impossible. There was a strong but terrible past beckoning and a fragile future seducing to take a leap, but what was most difficult was enduring the present. Every single day was passing by her, and nothing she did was channeling to the right direction. Breathing without thinking seemed like an impossible task. She just wished she could put all her thoughts to sleep and enjoy the very moment she was living.

 

She lay wide awake in her bed. Her legs kept shaking under her quilt, and her thoughts kept swaying beneath the sleep derived mind. Her eyes were tired, even so were not ready to close. Yet again her life was changing and this time for eternity. She had to make a decision and stand by it for a lifetime. The thought made her shudder. There was no way of knowing which road leaded to heaven and which to hell. The thought kept her awake into the wee hours. But today she felt asleep just after mid night. And then she had a dream.

She had a dream that she was stranded at a crossroad, an actual crossroad. Her denim was frayed and her backpack lay on the ground uncared for. With one hand she was fidgeting with the strap of her camera bag that she still held onto with utmost care. Her dark brown shades were the only relief from the scorching sunlight that was blasting on her. She could see the horizon over wavy fumes of hot air. There was nothing behind her, on the road that took her back to where she began her journey from, that she was sure of now. On her right lay a concrete road that seemed to take her to a dubious land and on the left was a patchy walkway, the road less traveled.  She was sure it would be an adventurous journey but she did not know where it would take her eventually. And in front of her lay barren land,  without any sign of even a birth of road. It stretched till the horizon. There were little bits of weeds trying to spring out from the ground at some places, but that was the only sign of any life on it. She stood there waiting for someone to come along and guide her. She waited all day. Her white t-shirt was all muddy by now. There was a steady wind blowing now and stars had started to pop their heads into the violet sky. But there was no sign of any one coming along to lead her to the right path. She collapsed and lay on the road, every inch of her exasperated. She hopelessly stared at the stars as the sky started turning black. And then she heard it. She heard music that stirred her awake in to her senses and as though hypnotized by it she was started walking in the direction of the provoking sounds. Before she knew she was in middle of a place that seemed to have sprung up from nowhere. There were snow-capped mountains and little streams of water running everywhere. The place smelled like musk and was filled with soft colored flowers.The ground was a soft carpet of lush green grass.It looked perfect until she got too close. The flowers had prickly thorns and the streams were out of reach. The grass was home to countless insects.The mountains remained flawless. She was confused by the imperfection of the place and yet could not resist the charm it radiated. She looked back at the road that had led her to this place. She saw only one long road; there was no sign of any intersection, no sign of any crossroad.

 

 

She woke up in the morning and her decision was made.

Five SMS Per Day

Indian Government has implemented a limit of five sms per day as a measure against the bulk msgs that have led to certain rumors scaring some innocent people from northeastern India residing in different states to flee back home.What is this mockery?It is like saying ‘Do not breathe,you might catch viral infection,there’s a rumored epidemic.’ But this post is not about how preposterous Government regulations are,it would be a very long,boring and venomous post then.This post is about how this ‘only five sms per day’ has affected my life.

If this rule would have cropped up around a year back or anytime before that,I would had been really sad.Almost panicky.I would had not know when to use those five precious messages and more importantly,for whom .I would had pondered,waiting for the right sms to reply,would had avoided replying to people and basically been clumsy throughout the day till I exhausted myself and those 5 sms.But since it didn’t happen then,and it’s happening now,I have a different story to tell.

When i first heard the news…i went ‘Maaan,is this really happening???’ I discovered the news around afternoon,and to make sure that it has been implemented,I quickly sent two msgs to a friend which were due long time,and I had already sent three before…and the news was indeed true!Well,I was busy that day,and then later at night, gtalk and Facebook were the rescuer.Had long chats with a couple of friend.Next day was a Sunday. I was surprised by the end of the day,i hadn’t even used those 5 msgs up!!! And no,I don’t have whatsapp, if that’s what you are thinking! I realised I have grown up,if not grown over msgsing. I agree sometimes it is better to just msg than to tackle those awkward silences on phone,I have found comfort in this form of correspondence.But I just realised that my texting has gone down,so much as to less than 5 msgs per day.Ok maybe even today,sometimes I send as many as 20 odd sms,but it’s not something that I need to do anymore!And I’m so glad to have reached this stage,grown out of the addiction!People who really matter will never miss out to tell you anything important because they couldn’t sms,and vice versa!Neither has it affected my work in any way.Infact out of today’s 5 sms,3 were sent to my sir at work,and they were just enough!!

So,5 sms per day,bring it on…!

Live your life every minute!

Today i was doing a few sketches and i realized how rarely I do this…When i completed it,and was staring at it to find flaws…i just realized i had a feeling of accomplishment! I had been wanting to do these message typos on recycled paper for ages now…The paper bags had been peeping out from the corner for almost a month…dying to be picked up,and used.Finally i did it! (photos coming up soon!)

I realized I want to do so many things..and i might be left with so little time.As of now I have no real responsibilities,no commitments, no appointments, no household work to do…nothing.I’m absolutely in a free-at-will phase! Except for the 9-6 job…I’m so so free to do everything I always wanted to do!

So today I have decided…everyday I am going to do something that I always wanted to do!Not just till this phase lasts…but for a lifetime! Because you never know how much time you are left with…I don’t want to be lying on my deathbed and thinking of all the things that I wish I could have done..or had gotten time to do…I realize that I have already wasted so much as till today…(OK,not entirely…I have done a few things in life) But i just want to live my life..and be happy and content with every minute I am alive! Are you living your life every moment??

P.S: Sometimes you sudden feel uneasy,when bad things are happening around you…and you feel like your time is up,suddenly,for no reason, your heartbeats increase,you think you are going to die…and thoughts like these crop up in your mind!!

RIP…happily!

I feel foolish today…and a little selfish too…how could I runt over the lack of love in my life…when the person who loves me the most has always been right next to me…and needing me??? How could I have given a great deal of importance to something I don’t have and completely ignored the most valuable thing in my life…? I realize now how trivial my issues are…when I see this person in front of me.
No one’s life is perfect, no one gets everything that they wish for, and nobody’s every dream comes true…SO WHAT?? I know I have two choices…to keep grumbling about what I couldn’t have or just put it in the past and value and nurture what I have been blessed with. And I chose to be happy…in all the love that I have ever received. I should be grateful to the person who has always stood by me, and pulled me out of deep troubles. So what if the person has been throwing you off for a little while…it’s just superficial….or all in my mind I guess. And as a matter of fact I am grateful…but I just need to manifest it better. And be a bit more responsible.
So I make a choice today…to burry all my issues, to put the past in its righteous place with no resentment…leave all my personal problems to rest in peace…and live life happily!!!